I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Randomize
