if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you didnt know i had herpes?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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