youre lurking in front of me
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
