I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
