It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
