coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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