Pappa wants mamma naked
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
