remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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