Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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