I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
