well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
