I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
