yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
