On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
