we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize