Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize
