Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
well I can't set my house on fire every night
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize