You're completely useless in the revolution.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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