MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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