there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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