he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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