they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
