And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize