All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
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