So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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