Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize