Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
