Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
