I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
