these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
