i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
