That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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