what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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