I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Randomize
