come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
