I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
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