You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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