this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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