i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
