the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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