i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just want nice things and good sex
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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