If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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