Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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