At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
