let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
