He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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