Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
