He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
