my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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