Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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